Mamalade

I didn’t expect to visit Melbourne this year, but Ben phoned a couple of weeks ago to say he’d arranged for me to visit him and Agnieszka the last week in October.

Tuesday 24th October, 2000: A Rainbow Day

It was raining lightly as Frances (Accompanied by two and a half-year-old Miles) drove me to the airport. Miles was thrilled to see a rainbow in the sky.

“Looks like a rainy day,” I said happily, thinking of my parched garden.

“It’s a rainbow day,” said Miles.

“Happy Meemar?” asked Miles as he trotted beside me through the airport terminal. “Not too fast?”

He was so excited to see the planes. “There’s a big daddy plane,” he said as a plane came in and turned around. “It goes round and round and round….” He spread his arms and spun around to demonstrate. “Where did the baby plane go?” he asked, as a distant plane took off and disappeared out of sight.

It’s only a two hour flight from Brisbane to Melbourne. I sat beside a friendly woman from Los Angeles who has travelled all over the world. She was a very interesting companion.

In Melbourne
After meeting me at Melbourne airport, Ben picked up Agnieszka from work and we had lunch together at a Chinese restuarant. Then I explored some of the shops while Ben and Agnieszka went back to work.

It was raining heavily when it was time to meet Ben after work and I was still trying to find my way out of Myers. After asking directions from a shop assistant I made my way past three men in suits who appeared to be standing in the entrance, looking out at the weather. I found myself in the display window! The “men” were manequins, displaying suits. I also walked into the Men’s toilet in Myers (luckily there was no one there.) When I told Ben about my escapades, he said it was alright, as long as he wasn’t with me when I did these things!

Wednesday 25th

A Quiet Day
They tell me it doesn’t always rain in Melbourne. But it seems to when I’m there. It was a very cold rainy and windy day. Since I’d had flu the week before, I decided to have a quiet day writing postcards in front of the fire with the cats, Olive and Oscar beside me.

The rain cleared in the afternoon, so I went for a walk to explore the neighbourhood. Ben and Agnieszka had moved to a different suburb since I visited them last year. All the gardens were looking lovely. There were so many flowers that I have never seen in Queensland. Even the wild flowers were beautiful. Little yellow and white daisies were sprinkled all over the footpaths. Most of the streets are lined with trees. Melbourne is lovely in Spring.

When Ben and Agnieszka came home from work, we went to a Gilbert and Sullivan concert at the Regent Theatre. It’s a beautiful old theatre.

Thursday, 26th October

City Explorer
Ben and Agnieszka had to work, so I went into the city with them. I wasn’t sure where I wanted to go, so I took a ride on the City Explorer bus. It’s not the cheapest way to go - $30 adults, $25 concession - but it goes to all the main tourist attractions and you can get on and off as you like. (The catch is, there’s really only time to visit one of these places properly and you could get there by tram if you know where you are going!)

The bus did a tour of the Town Hall, Rialto Obversation Deck, Aquarium, Shrine of Remembrance, Arts Centre, Southgate, St Paul’s Cathedral, Cooks Cottage, St Patrick’s Cathedral, Parliament House, National Gallery, Old Melbourne Gaol, Lygon Street South, Museum, Lygon Street, Melbourne University, Melbourne Zoo, Queensberry Street, Queen Victoria Market, Melbourne Central, Chinatown and Bourke Street Stall. (Yes, I’m reading from the brochure.)

I sat in the top deck of the bus, and felt like ducking every time the bus passed under low tree branches which rattled on the roof. Down below, the driver gave a commentary in a flat dry voice and made a few attempts at jokes that didn’t quite make it.

Queen Victoria Market
I stayed on the bus for most of the round trip, not sure if I’d find the right stop to get back on, then when it pulled up at Queen Victoria Market, nearly everyone got off and it seemed a good idea.

The market consists of mostly fruit and vegetable stalls, and lots of clothing stalls. There were some others selling nick-nacks.

I bought a red jacket, which I wore every day for the rest of the week The weather was still cold, though quite pleasant.

The toilet at the market has a big sign above the hand basin. “PLEASE DO NOT SPIT IN THIS HAND BASIN.” I couldn’t help wondering how many people have an overwhelming urge to spit when they read the sign!

I was lucky to get back to the bus stop just a few minutes before the City Explorer returned. I decided I’d go on to Rialto Towers, but the bus pulled up at the Town Hall and we were informed that it wasn’t leaving for another half hour and would be going back the other way. So I took a tram.

Rialto Towers
In her book, “Brain Power,” Marilyn vos Savant says, “… three dimensional orientation is better for your understanding than two dimensional. Whenever ever you can, go up to the top floors of tall buildings and look out the windows, checking for landmarks you recognise and the direction you’re facing…”

I thought of this as I took the lift up to the observation deck on the 55th floor of Rialto Towers. Alas, I don’t think it has improved my brain, but it was an enjoyable experience. I walked around the viewing area several times, drinking in the view. I felt reluctant to descend back into the city, but it was almost time to meet Ben and Agnieszka as they finished work.

We ate at an Italian Restaurant then attended a movie preview, which was interesting, because the author /director was there to discuss it with the audience afterwards.

Friday 27th October

The Dish
Agnieszka had the day off. We went to see “The Dish.” A light hearted movie about the people operating the Parkes Radio Telescope which was the key link up in the Apollo 11 moonwalk. It’s worth watching, though I can understand why some people are upset about the “country bumpkin” image it projects about Australians.

Afterwards we browsed in the big bookshop nearby and explored the boutiques along Chappel Road. I was impressed with the bright vibrantly coloured clothing , - but when do people wear these clothes? From what I’ve seen, everyone in Melbourne seems to wear black! Of course the Melbourne Cup is coming up…..

We met Ben after work and went to a Bach recital “Sleepers Wake” in St Paul’s Cathedral…

“Watch! Pray! Pray! Watch!
Keep prepared for the day
When the Lord of Majesty
Brings the world to its end!”

Lovely music. Beautiful church. But oh, the pews are hard to sit on!

Saturday 28th October.

We all went to the Museum. I liked the “Early Melbourne” exhibits and the simulated trip down the sewer!

Sunday 29th October

Great Ocean Road
We took the scenic drive down the Great Ocean Road. Miles and miles and miles of curves - I’m glad I don’t get car-sick! It was late afternoon by the time we reached the spectacular Twelve Apostles Rocks. I loved the white flowers growing all around the area. They look something like Geraldton Wax flowers.

I thought the trip back up the inland road was really more scenic than the Great Ocean Road. The sun was setting over the green paddocks, dotted with sheep and black and white cows, and bordered by tall Cedar trees. (I think that’s what they were.)

It was dark before we were half way home and I found it hard to stay awake after our long day.

Monday. 30th October

Canoing on the Yarra
Ben and Agnieszka both had the day off. We went rowing in a canoe on the Yarra River. I gingerly placed my heavy handbag between my feet, thinking “It will sink straight to the bottom of the river if the canoe tips over - and if I hang on to it, I’ll sink straight to the bottom!” We rowed upstream and manouvred the canoe under a tree where we shared buns with a water fowl and listened to bell birds. Two white ducks escorted us on the way back down stream.

Back on land, I perched on a low wall while Ben and Agnieszka cooked delicious steak on a barbecue. We discovered that there was a colony of hairy caterpillars on the wall and I had to be thoroughly brushed down before we left!

After lunch we went to the Aquarium and saw all kinds of sea creatures that I didn’t know existed. The seahorses were fascinating.

Then we went to see “Saving Grace.” A very entertaining movie with some really funny scenes.

Tuesday 31st October

St Kilda
My last day in Melbourne. It was a good day to be out of the house, because Ben and Agnieszka were having their house restumped and the men were going to jack it up that day. And there was something I still wanted to do. I had to see if I could find my own way back home from the city. I went in with Ben and Agnieszka when they went to work.

After wandering around the shops for a while I realised the hectic week was beginning to catch up with me and all I really wanted to do was sit down somewhere! So I caught a tram and took a ride to St Kilda Beach. It was a pleasant trip, past terrace houses and beautiful gardens. The beach looked inviting but I stayed on the tram until it stopped at the end of the line in the shopping area. I got off and bought a fruit bun to eat before catching another tram back into the city.

“A fruit bun??” said one of my friends, when I told her later. “In St Kilda? Didn’t you go into one of the fancy food places? Didn’t you buy one of their rich cakes??”

Back in the city, I managed to find the right train, then walked about half a mile from the station to Ben and Agnieszka’s house. It was a pleasant walk, along tree-lined streets and past fragrant gardens.

There was just enough time to finish packing my bags and take photos of the house and cats before Ben and Agnieszka came home and took me to the airport.

Home again
It was raining when I arrived back in Brisbane. Joel and Frances were waiting with little Miles. Miles shrieked with delight when I appeared and held my hand all the way to the car.

My cats were a bit aloof when I first arrived home, but when I got into bed they both joined me and purred all night. I’d had a wonderful time, but it was good to be home!

Photography doesn’t seem to be my forte. At least I remembered to put a film in the camera this time, but the film didn’t wind on properly and a lot of pictures were taken one on top of another! This picture shows Oscar sitting on his scratching post, but the white paws belong to Olive, who is faintly visible (twice) if the picture is turned sideways,to the left. I actually took seven photos in between the one of Oscar and the two of Olive. Notice the skyscrapers in the background.

Pandora’s box

“Your motor is leaking oil,” the man at the service station told me when I stopped for petrol. “You probably need a new gasket.”

So I left the car with him last Monday. At midday he phoned to tell me it was done. “But I took it for a run, ” he said. “And there are a few problems…”

It needs a new tail-shaft - the present one is worn and dangerous. “It could make the car pole vault!” And probably a new centre joint. The brakes are beginning to crack and there’s a hole in the muffler… ” and how long is it since it had a tune up and service?”

Phew! He certainly opened a Pandora’s box - but I’m so glad he took the trouble to check it over. It’s going to be expensive, but I’d much rather pay with money than with my - or someone else’s - life!

Golden Hammer

While the car was being fixed (I got half the jobs done so far) I spent the day with Mum and Dad. Shea and Callum (my niece and nephew) were there as Shea’s school was having a pupil - free day.

“How much am I bid for the ming vase?” Shea had brought the ‘Golden Hammer” auction game.

“$2,000!” said Mum.

“$12,000!” said Callum.

And so the bidding escalated to dizzy heights. Callum might not have been a prudent bidder, but I was amazed to see how he could count out the money and give correct change - he hasn’t even started school yet!

He’s so funny when he gets excited while playing games. His facial expressions are constantly changing - to say nothing of the sound effects! He can make strange sounds by putting his hand in his armpit and flapping his arm. “You need sticky armpits and wet hands,” he informed us.

And when the game reached a thrilling climax, he stands on one leg on the chair and makes another sound by bending his other leg…

Shea grimaced menacingly at him with her new teeth braces. (She’d just been to the orthodontist.) “I’m uglier now!” she warned him. (She’s not really - they’re not very noticeable at all.)

The game collapsed into utter chaos when Frances arrived with two and a half-year-old Miles.

“My turn,” said Miles. He rolled the dice and moved my marker for me. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15…

But Callum won with great arm and leg flapping. His extravagant bidding had paid off and he’d accumulated all the auction items and most of the wealth.

Mum and Shea had given up and gone outside. The game was getting a bit too ridiculous!

I was five the first time I spoke in front of an audience. Wearing my new pink organdie frock, I stood on the stage at the Sunday School Anniversary and recited,

Once I saw a little bird go hop, hop, hop.
And I said “Little bird, will you stop, stop, stop?”
I was going to the window to say “How do you do,”
But he shook his little tail and far away he flew.”

The audience clapped politely while the boys at the back sniggered

As the next Sunday School Anniversary approached, I vehemently insisted to my parents that I would never go through that dreadful experience again. But the Sunday School superintendent smiled sweetly and asked, “You’ll recite for us again this year, won’t you?”

I hung my head shyly and whispered “Yes,” simply because I was too timid to say “No!”

Half a century later, I’m discovering that speaking in front of a crowd of people needn’t be such a terrifying experience.

“I’d rather give a speech than drive on the freeway,” I commented to my friend Penne, as she drove through the heavy traffic last Sunday on our way to the Toastmasters Area Conference.

“You’re joking!” said Penne.

But I wasn’t joking. Surely there’s less risk speaking to a group of people sitting quietly on their chairs, than it is to maneuver through the same number of people enclosed in metal capsules that are hurtling toward you at 100 miles per hour!

Not that I didn’t feel nervous about the Humorous Speech competition. I certainly felt a few butterflies as the time grew near. But once I got started, I actually enjoyed it. I know I gave a really good performance and would have even won the competition - if it hadn’t been for that other woman who made an absolutely brilliant and funny speech about going to an auction….

In all, our club gained three second places. But watch out for us next year!

You can read my speech if you like. “Every Cat in the Twilight’s Gray.”

The Area Conference was held at the Shaftesbury Campus. It was a lovely peaceful setting for a Conference. The Conference Hall overlooks bushland and a lake. In the afternoon, we had time to go for a relaxing walk by the lake. Just before dark, some kangaroos came out of the bush and stood around watching us as we sat on the verandah.

If you ever go to the Shaftesbury Conference Centre, do go and visit the toilet. It is freshly painted a peaceful blue and A.C., (as the founder of the centre is affectionately known,) is so proud of the butterflies painted on the wall. When he saw me heading in the direction of the toilet he hurried along beside me and asked eagerly “Are you going to the toilet? Come and see the butterflies.” Each time he saw someone emerging from the toilet, he asked “How do you like the butterflies?” They really were beautiful. I wish I’d taken my camera.

Biographical

Before the Humorous Speech competition, I had to fill in a Biographical form. This gives the contest chairman a guide when interviewing the contestants after the speeches. Here are some of the questions and the answers I wrote. (Just in case you are interested.)

Occupation
Volunteer for World Vision.

(I spend a lot of my time sorting, washing, pricing items for our World Vision Club’s Jumble Sales, cooking, sewing or potting plants for our street stalls, and planning and organising our meetings and social functions.)

What are you interested in?
People - learning what makes them tick and how to communicate better. Learning computer skills. Reading. Gardening.

(I also love music and used to play the piano a lot, but never seem to get around to it these days.)

Do you have a nickname?
My two-year-old grandson calls me “Meemar”

(He was trying to say “Grandma” I didn’t really want to be called “Grandma”, because that’s what all the kids call my mother, but Joel insisted I had to be Grandma, because their dog knew me as “Grandma” and he didn’t want to confuse the dog. Miles solved the problem when he called me “Meemar”)

What was your most embarrassing experience?
Losing my half-slip in the shopping centre.

(I was walking along the footpath in the shopping centre, when the elastic in my half slip broke, and it started to slide down. I quickly ducked into a vacant aisle in the supermarket, and quietly stepped out of my slip, and tucked it into my handbag.

Later when I told my friend how lucky I was that no one was around, she said, “What about the security cameras in the supermarket?”)

How would your friends and family describe you?
It depends whether they are mad at me.

(The night we wrote “warm fuzzies” for one another at a Toastmasters meeting, some of the descriptions were “bubbly”, “lively”, “funny”, “friendly”, “helpful” , etc.

But I’ve also been told that I’m “bossy, negative and too competitive.”
Someone else said I was “stubborn and rebellious” when I didn’t do what they wanted.)

Secret Ambition
To tidy my bedroom before I die.

(I call my bedroom “my office.” There are always piles of books and papers that I am currently reading, as well as other odds and ends that don’t seem to belong in any particular place.)

What person do you most admire?
Aung San Suu Kyi

Suu Kyi was awarded the 1991 Nobel Peace Prize for her fight for human rights and freedom in Burma.

(I also admire one my friends, who is always bubbly and cheerful in spite of life- threatening health problems and constant pain. I’ve seen her looking grey and struggling to breathe - still cracking jokes!)

If you could be in a TV show, what kind would it be and what part would you play?
I’d play myself in a sitcom about my chaotic life.

(Actually, my life is not that chaotic, but some of the people around me and the situations they get themselves into would make an interesting TV show.)