Mamalade

Tonight we are going to look at the most important skill you can learn in Toastmasters. With this skill, you can win friends and influence people, get along with your co-workers and have them do what you want them to. This skill is Evaluation.

What is evaluation?

Immediate feedback. Encouragement. Helpful advice.It used to be called “Critique”. Constructive criticism. The dictionary definition of evaluation is, “Ascertaining the value of.” “Appraising carefully.” I like to think of it as “Digging for diamonds.”

How does evaluation help the speaker? Evaluation provides immediate feedback. It reinforces the speaker’s strengths and offers ways to improve. It builds and maintains self esteem. It motivates the speaker to return and give another speech – an even better speech.
How does evaluation help us?

Evaluation improves our listening skills. It provides an opportunity for impromptu speaking. Evaluation is one of life’s most important skills, when you use the basic rule of presenting an evaluation, that is, praise, say what you want done, then praise again. This is the best way to get people to do what you want them to. You can successfully raise you children using this method. You can even train your dog! (“Here boy, SIT!” “Good dog!”)
How does Evaluation help our club?

Evaluation sets the standard for the club. It shows that the Toastmasters programme is working. Without effective evaluations, you don’t have a quality club.
What is a quality evaluation? To be effective, an evaluation should motivate the speaker to improve. If you just try to make him feel good by telling him his speech is wonderful when it isn’t, then you are just wasting everyone’s time and dragging down the standards of the organisation.
What should we do before we evaluate a speech?

An evaluator needs to prepare. Talk to the speaker. Show that you are interested.
Contact the speaker in advance and discuss the manual objectives and the evaluation guidelines.
Ask about any concerns regarding the speech or the speakers abilities.
Get to know the speaker. Observe their earlier speeches. Look at previous evaluators comments in their manual and note whether the speaker has worked on their suggestions for improvement.
Consider the objectives in the manual. Find out what the speaker is aiming for. And don’t expect him to run before he can crawl. For instance, I’ve heard evaluators of the first 2 or 3 speeches suggest that the speaker could have used more gestures. Now, that is the objective for the 4^th speech and I don’t think it is fair to bring it up when evaluating an earlier speech. Of course, if he is already attempting gestures, he should be praised for his efforts, but it shouldn’t be expected of him at this stage.
Presenting the evaluation.
Tonight, I’m concentrating mainly on how to present the evaluation. There’s not time to discuss all the points you could look for.
So how do we go about delivering an evaluation?

An evaluation is a three minute mini-spech. It needs an opening, a body and a conclusion.

Can you suggest a good opening?

Acknowledge the speaker. “This evening we had the privilege of listening to an interesting and informative speech by….” What other ways could you describe the speech? (Challenging, thought proving, humorous, inspiring, etc)

There’s your opening. Now for the body.

You want to reinforce the strong points of the speech.

Say what you liked about the speech and tell why. You could say, “I liked the way he used body language, for example, when he said this, he did this!”

Think of one or two more things to commend.

Next we come to points for improvement. Limit it to no more than two. We don’t want to overwhelm the speaker – and we do want him to come back!

Don’t say, “You did that wrong!” You are not issuing a judgement on behalf of the club, you are just telling what effect the speech had on you personally.

Personalise your language

Use phrases such as, “It seemed to me…”

“ I feel that…”

“ I believe…”

Instead of saying, “He spoke too fast, you might say something like, “If he had slowed his rate of speaking, I would have found it easier to take in the excellent points he was making.”

We usually use the third person rather than address the speaker directly. It brings in the whole audience and takes some of the pressure off the speaker.

Now for the conclusion.

How can you close in a way that will make the speaker want to start preparing his next speech when he goes home?

Summarise what you have already said.

Comment on what you think are his strongest points and congratulate the speaker on his effort.

Evaluation teaches us to think of the other person. To ask ourselves, “What advice can I give that will help him to do better?

Remember the diamond cutter. Just as the diamond grinder hones and polishes the diamond, you are honing and polishing a speaker. Slowly, gently, little by little, evaluation will bring out the potential and brilliance of our members.

Big Brother – or Sister

Don’t you just love it when someone asks you about something you know! People often ask me questions, but I don’t always know the answers. Questions like- “Have you seen my car keys?” “What did you just come in the room to get? ” Where were you last Monday?”

But I love it if they ask me about Toastmasters! And I felt thrilled and honoured recently when a new member asked me to be her mentor.

What is a mentor?

A MENTOR SERVES AS A ROLE MODEL, COACH, AND CONFIDANTE, OFFERING KNOWLEDGE, INSIGHT, PERSPECTIVE OR WISDOM USEFUL TO THE MENTEE.

You’ll realise of course, that when my mentee chose me, she hadn’t seen me trying to chair a meeting!

But there is a lot I can help her with. It’s like being a big sister.

Have you noticed if you have more than one child in your family, the younger ones seem to pick up things at an earlier age than the first one did? That’s because they have the older one as a role model. My three younger sisters learned much more quickly than I did, but they wouldn’t have advanced nearly as far without me! Of course, my parents didn’t always approve of the things I taught them!

Well, in Toastmasters, a mentor is like a big brother or sister to the newer members.

We all know how daunting it can be; joining a club like Toastmasters, and watching the more experienced members perform their roles with confidence and skill. We think we will never be able to do that!

But I can help my mentee…

LEARN THE PROGRAMME. Explain the speech requirements in the basic manual. What is expected when she is assigned certain roles at the meetings.

LEARN CLUB STANDARDS AND CUSTOMS. How things are done in Toastmasters.

DEVELOP CONFIDENCE. Explain to her that she is among understanding friends – that we are all learning at our own individual level. Help her to realise that Toastmasters is a safe friendly environment to practice her communication skills. Give her the knowledge she needs which will enable her to

PARTICIPATE MORE. Encourage her to become involved in Club activities so that she will receive optimum benefit.

Help her to QUICKLY LEARN SPEAKING SKILLS. By offering encouragement and assistance if required as she prepares her first speaking assignments. By pointing out her strong points and offering constructive feedback when required.

Of course, my mentee is not the only one who will benefit from the relationship.

I discovered years ago, that the best way to learn something is to teach it to someone else. While I am explaining things to my mentee,

I will be REFINING THE SKILLS I ALREADY HAVE. and LEARNING NEW SKILLS.

And there are other rewards.

MENTORS…

LEARN FROM THEIR MENTEES. Mentees often offer new information and perspectives.

REMAIN PRODUCTIVE. Mentors continue to make use of their own knowledge and skills.

DO SOMETHING FOR OTHERS. Its an opportunity to give back some of the benefits we have reaped from Toastmasters

RECEIVE RECOGNITION. Earn the respect of fellow members, and gratitude of the mentee. I know my mentee is grateful. When I helped her with her speech, she brought me a chocolate bar.

The club as a whole benefits. Clubs that encourage members to mentor one another;

HAVE MORE MEMBERS. Turnover is reduced because members quickly become involved in the club and develop friendships.

HAVE MORE SATISFIED MEMBERS. Members continue to learn and grow and enjoy the club experience.

RETAIN MORE MEMBERS. When members are satisfied, they stay in their clubs longer.

A Mentor needs special qualities. You have to be

AVAILABLE. There’s no point in offering to become a Mentor if you are too busy to spend some time talking to your mentee and answering any questions they might have. And don’t assume that your mentee doesn’t need help if she doesn’t contact you. Many new toastmasters are too shy to ask.

You need PATIENCE, remembering that everyone advances at their own rate. And be prepared to explain things over again if necessary.

Be SENSITIVE to their needs. Use tact in encouraging and motivating. Never betray their confidences.

RESPECTFUL. You might not always agree with your mentees point of view, but you can respect your differences.

FLEXIBLE. Your mentee may not accept your advice and choose to do things her own way. Or she may turn to another Toastmaster for advice. There’s nothing wrong with that. I think it’s even advisable if your skills are not strong in certain areas. For instance I would understand if my mentee asked another Toastmaster for advice when she is chairman.

BE SUPPORTIVE OF THE CLUB. Show pride in your club and what it can do for members. It goes without saying that a mentor would never speak disparagingly of the club or fellow members.

You need to have KNOWLEDGE about your club and the Toastmasters programme. Or at least know where to find out the necessary information. But for goodness sake don’t try to impart all your information at once. My son does that when I ask him about the computer – and I feel more confused than ever!

You must be CONFIDENT yourself if you are to instill confidence in your mentee. Keep a positive outlook, but don’t be afraid to let your mentee see that you have weaknesses too. We are all human!

You must be PREPARED TO LISTEN. Acting as a sounding board is sometimes all the help required. A friend once came to me with a problem. After a while, she exclaimed, “That’s it! I knew you would be able to help me!” I hadn’t said a thing, but putting her problem into words had helped her to see things clearly.

SHOW CONCERN for your mentee. You must really care and want to help your mentee to grow.

Of course, if a mentor/ mentee relationship is to be successful, mentees have responsibilities and obligations as well.

Mentees should be…

EAGER TO LEARN. Mentees must be willing to take on new challenges.

RECEPTIVE. Mentees must be open to feedback, viewing it as an opportunity to improve themselves.

OPEN TO NEW IDEAS. Mentees should be able to see things from other perspectives.

LOYAL. Mentees do not violate confidences or trust.

GRATEFUL. They don’t have to bring chocolate, but Mentees appreciate the help their mentors are giving.

Usually, by the time mentees have developed to the point where they are functioning effectively on their own, the relationship has changed from that of mentor/mentee into a strong warm friendship. Mentors can find new mentees to help and former mentees now have the skills to become mentors themselves.

And don’t think mentors are just for new members! There are bound to be members in our club who excel in some skill that you are lacking. Why not ask them for advice? As I said at the beginning, people love to talk about what they know. Or is there someone who could benefit from your knowledge and experience? Then pass it on. That’s what Toastmasters is all about, isn’t it?

The Speech Only You Can Give

“I’ve got no idea what to talk about!”

Have you ever heard someone say that? Or said it yourself? I have.

No idea…

Can you believe it?

Look around. This room alone is full of potential speech topics. There could be one right in your hand.

Take a look at your hand. What does it make you think of? Let your imagination run free.

You might like to write the word “hand” on the back of your programme and do a bit of word association.

How about caring hands, doing things by hand – the old way, hand-me-downs… Can you think of another one?

Do any of those thoughts trigger an idea for a speech? And that’s just the beginning. You can do the same exercise with any object, sound, smell etc.

See? The problem is not a lack of ideas. You know what the problem is?

It’s too many ideas! Too many voices in your head, clamouring, “Choose me, choose me!” While another, louder voice over-rides each one and says, “Naah, that won’t work!”

The challenge is to choose one topic from all those ideas. A topic that you know you can run with and turn it into a great speech.

A great speech is the speech that only you can give.

Think of your first Toastmasters speech. The Icebreaker. This is the speech where you tell us what you want us to know about you. Out of a whole universe of possible topics, you have to zoom in and focus on what you are most familiar with. Yourself. And it works, because it’s the speech that only youcan give. You become personally involved in your topic and the more personal involvement, interest and enthusiasm you can bring to your speech, the more likely your audience will respond in a positive way.

But you don’t have time to tell everything in an Icebreaker Speech. How could you possibly fit all there is to know about you in 4 to 6 minutes! So you still have lots of material for more great speeches!

You might have briefly mentioned your family. But we still haven’t heard about your family customs, your views on child rearing, or your last family trip to Lumbago.

Maybe you mentioned your job, but didn’t have time to tell what your job entails, and how you feel about it.

Your ice-breaker may have included some of your interests. If you’re keen on sports, you could tell us about the great game you won, or if you’re like me you could tell how you opted for safer activities after being hit in the eye with a cricket ball.

You could talk about your passion for music, collecting toenail clippings, or your current campaign against nose pickers.

Any of these would make a great speech, because you are personally involved in the topic. It’s the speech that only you can give. No one else can tell it from your viewpoint.

And it’s the viewpoint that turns your topic into a do-able speech. It’s a bit like taking a photo. When I showed my friends a photo I had taken of the Sydney Harbour Bridge, they said, “I’ve never seen the bridge from that angle before.” I had stood and snapped the photo from a place they hadn’t thought of. And that made it more interesting.

It’s the same with a speech. Take it from your perspective. No one else has seen it from where you stand.

Like a camera, your speech should only cover what you see in the view- finder. I remember the day my third grade teacher took us all outside to draw a landscape. But first, he got us to each make a little cardboard frame to look through. We were told to hold up the frame and to draw only what we could see within it. Narrow the focus. If something is happening on a global scale, zoom in on one person and tell how it affects them.

There are so many angles to every topic. Don’t serve the whole pie at once. Cut off one slice. And save the rest for another time. Tonight I could have talked on “How to Become a Better Speaker” but that subject is too broad. So I’ve focussed on the small slice of “Selecting a Topic.” There are still plenty of other slices in the pie.

To narrow the focus, ask yourself, what is the purpose of this speech. What is the central theme, the thought that I want my audience to remember? See if you can define your purpose in one sentence.

Let’s see, suppose you are going to speak about …sailing!
So you write…
The purpose of this speech is to persuade, inform or entertain (choose one) my target audience with the thought that (never “about”)… sailing is fun. Or sailing is not for the seasick.

Once you have decided on the thrust of your message, you know what kind of information and anecdotes you’ll need to put the point across to your audience.

Make sure your topic is appropriate for your audience and the occasion. Most of our speeches are presented in a Toastmasters Club setting, which gives us plenty of scope with a sympathetic audience. But if you’re speaking to the local football club a speech on needlework mightn’t go down too well. And a group of teenagers mightn’t be enthused about retirement plans.

But a lot of topics can be adapted to fit the occasion. Let’s suppose you have a passion for a particular subject – how can you make it meet the objectives for your next speech?

For instance, I like cats, as most of you know. I haven’t used that topic for all my speeches, but it would be possible.

For my Icebreaker speech, I could have described myself from my cat’s viewpoint. For my second speech where I had to speak in earnest, I could have spoken against cruelty to cats. An informative speech could be about cats in history and a persuasive speech could be on the advantages of owning a cat and so on.

I’ve heard of some people doing a second CTM, by speaking on a different facet of Toastmasters for each speech.

The ideas are endless. And they’ll come to you when you are least expecting them. Sometimes a table topic will trigger an idea. One of my speeches evolved from a table topic that I didn’t answer very well at the time, but I thought about it after I went home and the idea grew. An idea might develop from your reaction to a news item or something in a book you are reading.

Don’t let the ideas just evaporate. Keep a notebook to jot down ideas and any relevant facts or anecdotes. Then when it is time to give that speech, choose the topic that you know that you can run with. Tell it from your point of view. It will be a great speech, because it will be the speech that only you can give.

The Main Thing

Don’t worry about delivery and platform techniques. Just remember,
The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing!

When you are presenting a speech, what is the main thing? What is it that you’ve carefully wrapped up in words and are presenting to your audience?

It’s the message! The reason you are speaking to these people is because you have something you want them to know!

So what does this have to do with delivery and platform techniques?
Everything!

If you are concentrating on the main thing- the reason you are going to speak, you will have purpose in your bearing as you walk to the lectern.

1. Approach the lectern confidently.

Have you ever watched someone appraoch you with an important message on their lips? Your neighbour on his way over to tell you your kids just hit a ball through his window. Your friend comes to tell of her daughter’s new baby. Do they approach diffidently wondering what you think of them? No! Their thoughts are totally taken up with the main thing – the message they have to impart!
Approach the lectern confidently. You have a message. That’s the main thing!

2. Speak clearly

There’s someone at the back of the room who needs to hear your message. Make sure he hears it. This is no time to act coy and worry about how your voice sounds.

What do you do when you look out your kitchen window and see your toddler escaping through your front gate?

You project your voice. “Johnny! You get back in here!” If the message is important enough, you have no trouble making it heard!

3. Speak from the heart

Last week Chris told us about finding a clock like her grandmother’s. Did you see the joy on her face and the pleasure in her voice? She was speaking from the heart, telling us about something that means a lot to her. And it showed in her face and in her voice, because she wanted us to know of the pleasure the clock gave her. That was the main thing. As you focus on your message, your voice will come alive. You will find yourself naturally using gestures and facial expressions to impart what you have to say.

4. Pause

“Guess what!”
I’m sure you’ve said that to your friends before telling some startling information. And what do you do to obtain the maximum effect?
You pause, look intently to see if they are on their edge of their seats, then drop your bombshell.

That’s how a pause is used in a speech.  You might say, “I’m going to tell you something that will change your life!”  Build up suspense. Get rapport with your audience.

5. Eye Contact

Look into their eyes. Command their attention! Communication is a 2 way thing, even when only one is speaking. Include them in it. Watch their expression for clues on when to proceed to the next point.

A good speaker makes his audience feel that she is talking directly to them in a normal conversation.

Forget about techniques.
You have a message.
You really want to let them know it.
That’s the main thing.